Tucked shirts looks masculine

So my husband told me that he finds tucked shirts too masculine looking (also blazers, but that's a whole other thing). I'm not sure if he means in general or just on me, but I don't see this at all. Curious what you ladies think, because I had no good answer for him?

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34 Comments

  • ironkurtin replied 8 years ago

    Baffled. Think it depends on the shirt. Madonna in Tom Ford was seriously tucked and could not have looked less like a dude.

  • Mo replied 8 years ago

    Sometimes I see this too. For me, it is when the pant is somewhat lower rise, nearer the hip. Then the tucking seems to obscure the waist and the lady is more straight up and down and less traditionally womanly (hourglassy) looking.

    EDIT: If the shirt is very tailored I would say this point is moot, but for an average top this often is the case

  • annagybe replied 8 years ago

    A big HUH? from me. Are we talking button downs, t-shirts, blouses, knits? The only thing I could think that could possibly be masculine is a plain button down, especially if it has a button down collar. But like an Anne Fontaine, no way!

  • Angie replied 8 years ago

    I'm glad that hubby has an opinion, Aida :)

    My hubby LOVES tailored tucked shirts and blazers! He thinks they look feminine. But then, he thinks my super short pixie looks feminine, as does my pinstripe Theory suit, and flat riding boots. Greg is different I guess.

    Aida, I love your tucked in shirt and blazer looks. You can't look masculine with long curly hair. FWIW :)

  • rae replied 8 years ago

    I don't think your hubby would find me very womanly, lol.

  • Angie replied 8 years ago

    (I think my equivalent to your hubby's analogy is bootcut corduroy pants on gals. But when they are skinny, they instantly look better to my eye).

  • Aida replied 8 years ago

    Thanks for the responses! These are very interesting to read. I'll have to share with him later, see if anything lines up with what he thinks. Or let him defend himself, I suppose ;)

    Ironkurtin, the thought came up because of a comment someone had made about "how to dress masculine" which included an outfit comprised of skinnies, boots, a blazer, and a v-neck top. Obviously the pieces selected would affect the final outcome but hubby thinks regardless it'll be masculine because of the blazer.

    Mo, he seems to dislike ALL tucking whether it shows off the waist (e.g.tucked into a skirt) or whether it obscures the waist (e.g. tucked into pants). So I can't win!

    Anna, he didn't specify but I have a feeling it applies to all tops but button-downs more so. Pretty much any time I wear a tucked top he'd prefer to see it untucked.

    Angie, I did try the long hair argument but he wasn't buying it ;) He definitely has strong opinions though he usually keeps them to himself unless I ask because they're so different from mine. He's been slowly coming around to some of my tastes (like boots), but his opinions on what is and isn't masculine haven't wavered much. I'm pretty sure he doesn't like corduroy either :)

    Rae, I think he would actually, especially the weekend version! He seems to like tomboy style, just tends to not like many tailored menswear pieces (I think). With the amount of bombshell you sport in your workday style, I think you're safe :)

  • Aida replied 8 years ago

    An update! If the pants are lower-rise then tucking is OK (a small win!). Hmm this obscures my waist when I do it, unless the top is very fitted....

  • Queen Mum replied 8 years ago

    well, I can see a pair of 501's and a plaid flannel shirt looking masculine :-)
    but I've never thought of a "stylish" shirt tucked into nicely cut jeans as looking masculine at all. Granted, it's not GIRLIE looking, but I think there is a huge chasm between girlie and masculine.
    Does hubby prefer more feminine looks like ruffles and dresses and such?

  • Aida replied 8 years ago

    Kim, he bats VERY hard for Team Minimal. Ruffles are a big negative, though he does like dresses. And skirts, but he likes them at the hip rather than the waist and definitely without tucked tops. Particular, isn't he? :) I'm starting to think that what he likes is SOFT more than anything; softer fabrics, softer colors, softer cuts.

    EDIT: Also, you raise an interesting point. I'm not sure he's making a difference between "not very girly" and "masculine". I think he's lumping the whole thing into masculine, regardless of the level of it.

  • Vicki replied 8 years ago

    Wow, Aida, if your hubby dislikes all tucking and he has strong opinions about it, that's tough to dissuade. I actually think tucked can be quite feminine, and accentuates the waist (I'm an hourglass). I've been doing more untucked lately, because I like the casualness of it, however, I'll still tuck when I feel it's appropriate (that sounds a bit odd!), and I know you could pull it off with your beautiful eyes and hair and whatever accessories you add! It's all in how you feel.

  • rae replied 8 years ago

    Hm, he doesn't like skirts to hit at the waist, either? Seems like somewhere along the line, the waist got associated with menswear. Do any men in his family wear their shirts tucked into Wranglers? Did he grow up in the 70s?

  • Aida replied 8 years ago

    Vicki, I like the casualness of untucked as well but I do tuck (or semi-tuck) fairly often, regardless of how hubby feels hehe. The bit that I find interesting in my discussions about tucking with him is that he is NOT interested in accenting the waist through tucking (I am an hourglass too). He would prefer that the top simply be fitted to highlight the shape, and if there IS tucking that it be down towards the hips. So I think that has a lot to do with him not liking it; when I tuck into a skirt that sits at my waist he seems to feel that it looks like I'm just trying to salvage an ill-fitting top. And he is ALL about fit these days (which I love).

    Rae, (above answer responds to you too!) he didn't grow up in the 70s hehe. I think we're only a couple years older than you, we both "grew up" in the 80s and 90s; he is very unfond of 80s fashion and seems to really identify with the minimalism of the 90s though not the severity. There is a good chance that the men in his family DID tuck into Wranglers. And wear cowboy hats and boots and ride quads and dirt bikes :)

  • Sveta replied 8 years ago

    Aida, there is something about a man who has a strong opinion in style which I really like! At least it is more interesting :-)
    However it is a very puzzling opinion as defining a waist was always considered to be feminine...

  • cjh replied 8 years ago

    I don't have anything to add to this discussion except to say, boy they can get some odd ideas, can't they? Men, that is... One of their entertaining qualities.

  • christy replied 8 years ago

    Okay, had to ask my own hubby...he says that tucked shirts are "pretty sexy actually"! :) LOL! Just out of curiosity...could he be associating tucked in tops at the waist with the "mom jeans" look? Because that is a look that is particularly not sexy! :)

  • Aida replied 8 years ago

    Sveta and Christy, hubby clarified for me that it's "in between" heights that he doesn't like: at the waist is "OK", at/below the hip is "good" (by far his preference for tucking, skirt or pants), but anywhere in between looks "bad". So I'm guessing the mid-rise pants + tuck are the ones that he's not liking, though nearly all my pants are low rise and I'm pretty sure none of my pants remotely qualify as "mom jeans" :) The at-the-waist-skirt + tuck not passing his filters has to do with him not liking anything that's torso-shortening, I think (suppose this applies to those mid-rise pants, too).

    Cathie, it certainly makes for interesting discussions :)

    AND so I asked my sister this question as well, and she ALSO thinks it's masculine! I suppose this may be one of those subjective things like waist surrender?

  • Jonesy replied 8 years ago

    Huh.

  • christy replied 8 years ago

    OMG - I in NO way meant to imply that ANY of your clothes could look like mom jeans! LOL! Hope that wasn't misinterpreted...egads...I'll be quiet now! :)

  • Aida replied 8 years ago

    *giggle at Jonesy* That was my reaction as well. Followed by, "er, what?"

    Christy, hehe I know you weren't! ^^

  • Jonesy replied 8 years ago

    Dudes can be wacky sometimes, can't they? But I'm sure my SO would say the same about women.

    The other day he received an order from UO. He had ordered some Levi's skinny cords in olive green and dark maroon. They looked good and he was happy. Then he found an almost exact replica of the dark maroon ones in his closet--never worn! The color was *slightly* different, but they were basically the same pants. I laughed so hard, of course, but then he reminded me that I have about 5 pairs of black boots that are essentially the same boots, in his mind :). So I guess we sometimes just see things differently...

  • Aida replied 8 years ago

    Jonesy, we definitely do see things differently :) My husband also does the "but you already have black boots" and I have to explain that 1 is a short engineer, 1 is tall riding, 1 is tall and heeled, and you know I could totally use a black bootie... and he says "but you already have lots of black boots" ^^ Your story is the exact opposite of my hubby: I need to GET him to replicate just so he actually has stuff to wear! When he finds jeans he likes I try to get him to buy more than, you know, 1 pair because he's not exactly into having a variety of bottoms like I am. He's usually very happy to have 2 pairs of jeans in rotation ;)

  • Mamapicklejuice replied 8 years ago

    Aida - My husband ALSO thinks tucking looks masculine. Aren't there a fair number of YLF-ers who do not tuck because they don't feel it's flattering? (Regardless of what label they put on it.)

    It seems in recent years men can still wear dressier shirts tucked and casual shirts untucked, but women have gravitated more towards untucked whether dressy or casual.

  • Elly replied 8 years ago

    I think women quit tucking with the rise of the low rise pant--- tucking anything not super-fitted into anything low rise eliminates the waist. I would love to get back into tucking, but I am not sure I will because I need a high rise pant to do it, and those are still hard to find. Mid-rise just isn't high enough on me and while I like the booty coverage it provides, I find it can make me look lumpier and chubby in the love handle region compared to low and high rise.

  • Jenava replied 8 years ago

    Ok, Ok, I have a theory!

    Is it the tucking, or is the fact that the bottoms are (or, her perceives them as) masculine and tucking shows more of them?

  • Miss G replied 8 years ago

    I get the lack of waist issue... but i also think its about the shirt being feminine enough... I've got some great shirts that have the french cuffs... and with a string of pearls and a bit of bling... my hubby loves it (at least says he does :-))

  • Lisa replied 8 years ago

    Aida-Your husband is just like mine. It is pulling teeth to get him to purchase clothes. For a 5 day workweek he has only 3 pairs of trousers. At least I got him to have 3 now, it used to be 2! For tucking, I think he is a soft type of guy. If a silk top was tucked I expect him to feel different than say a BB non iron button down which will have some rigidness to it. And blazers are also more rigid than say a cardigan. But with your hair, there is no WAY you would ever look masculine. Your curls rule!

  • Heather replied 8 years ago

    Call me Mr. Heather.

  • Aida replied 8 years ago

    Thank you all for discussing this with me, it's been very interesting and educational! Between this discussion and continuing to discuss with hubby I think I've got it figured out (along with a few other handy insights into his style preferences). [EDIT: There were some very interesting theories raised above, and I have a feeling some of them also apply, depending on the clothing items involved in the outfit.]

    Hubby gave me the three examples below for "OK" (#1), "Good" (#3), and "Bad" (#2). It turns out the tucking alone isn't the issue he has; it has to do with proportions created (happy surprise!) depending on where the tucking happens. Specifically, how it will shorten my torso (which is long), and emphasize my shoulders (which are broad). He feels that the shorter I make my torso the wider my shoulders appear which makes for a more masculine look, or makes me look stockier than I am; in the case of tucking into high-waisted skirts like in #1, it balances out a bit because the skirt is so very feminine. (Though apparently there is an added qualifier for high-waisted skirts that the waistband can't be wide *sigh*)

    Not something I usually think about, especially the torso part since my main proportions goal is to lengthen the leg and I have extra torso to spare ;) In my style journey I haven't paid much attention my strong shoulder line because my hips used to balance it, but these days (after losing weight) my shoulders are a bit wider than my hips. Most amusing to me is that I had added IT as my secondary body type just this week, and hubby noticed it way before I did. I suppose he _is_ paying attention to all my babbling and clothing musings :)

  • Kate replied 8 years ago

    Fascinating! I pretty much only tuck like #1 (at my waist), or at #2 if the skirt is too big to stay up at my waist. I never do #3 because it doesn't accentuate my waist at all. And I'm an hourglass with IT tendencies. Now I'll have to check if #1 is actually making my shoulders look super broad...

  • Elly replied 8 years ago

    I actually think 3 is the least shoulder accentuating, but the most masculine. Then again, I love it, because that is totally my style.

  • Aida replied 8 years ago

    Kate, I've a feeling the wide striped shirt isn't helping with the shoulders in #1 :) I think you also wear softer cuts and fabrics than I do which I'm sure helps minimize the IT effects with that type of tucking. For what it's worth I don't think I've ever thought your shoulders look super broad with that type of tucking.

    Elly, that's what I see as well! So I'm thinking maybe it's not the vibe of the outfit that he's reading as masculine, but whether or not the outfit gives me a "masculine shape" (shoulders seem to be the major determining factor of that, based on our discussion), if that makes sense.

  • Ruby Tuesday replied 8 years ago

    Ah bless Aida, this has been like pulling hens teeth for you.

    So I gather hubby does not believe that tucking is masculine but has tried to express that he thinks tucking for you, in certain circumsatnces, may not be the most figure flattering.

    Take heed girls, your man may notice more than we assume and MEN notice?

  • Mamapicklejuice replied 8 years ago

    Aida - how fortunate to have a husband so in tune with your style and fits and flatters! You are very lucky. I don't think his opinions are wacky or out of left field at all...of course, they are just opinions, and you have to weigh them against your own, because yours count, too! :)

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